Personal rant

I just had to write these feelings out. It's a personal rant that I am posting just to show someone out there that is going through something like this that you are not alone.




I started this out not knowing what to say. This thought has been really have on my heart as of the past few months. I feel like this is a safe place for me to express these thoughts and emotions. I been in love with a man for 10 years of my life, but I always been the best friend. For 10 years, I just played my role as my heart bleed. Don't get it wrong, I had relationships, but my heart always wanted him. I tried and tried so many times to get over him and "let it go", but there was always something not allowing me to let go. Now I see that the writing is on the wall and he has a girlfriend, but that force will not let go. I miss my best friend, but this foolish pride will not allow me to reach out to him. I guess I don't want to seem like a pest or something. I guess I just got to get use to not talking to him, and it's going to be hard since I known him since I was 14.

New Year = NEW CHANGES

 Happy New Year Everybody!!!!!

As some of you can see, I changed up my blog background. I came up with the idea to change the background every month. It's important to shake things up every once in a while, right? This year I will be more open and getting back to what my blog originally was started to do. Promote Detroit in a positive light.

I want to thank every single person who have came to my blog, read my post, and left a comment. I promise to make this blog bigger and better.

New Year & NEW PLAN

Hey everybody!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is the last post of the 2013, and it's been a great year for me. I want to thank all of you for the love I have receive here on my blog. I have over 1,700 views, and it's all because of you and I thank you.  2014 is going to be even big and better. I plan with your help and support we can make my blog popular and spread the word about the Good in people and my hometown. With your help and support, I can stay with my diet and be healthier.

I still can not be it's the end of 2013. Tell me in the comments below or tweet me using the hash tag below with what's your plan / New Year Resolutions for 2014, and I will reply to the first 20 people who use this tag.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!

#awordwithjhonzalee

Un-Deathly Love

 

I am a hopeless romantic. Some one once asked me what kind of relationship am I looking for. I did not know how to describe in words my "perfect" relationship. Then it hit me, I only said "I want to be in love like Morticia and Gomez Addams". They looked at me with confusion in their eyes. It's true, I want my relationship to be like their relationship. No matter if it looks wrong to others it feels right to us. 

 

The love that the Addams family couple has for each other is the most pure you will ever see in Hollywood. They may not be a real couple, but they are the go to for all standards of relationships and marriages. I love how after so many years they still love and lust after each other like it's the first time seeing each other. 

I could go on and on about this couple, but I know I will at a later date,yet until then my friends go and watch the movies and youtube the television show. I see you later darlings. 

What is a "Friend" to you?

What are friends to you? No, I'm not talking about these friends, but

according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary the word means:

a :  one attached to another by affection or esteem

b :  acquaintance

                                                                                             a :  one that is not hostile

                                                                                b :  one that is of the same nation, party, or group

                                                                                  :  one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)

                                                   :  a favored companion

Do you agree with this definition? I do in part. Yes, your friends are attach to you by affection. If something happen to your friend or even when they get sick, you always there to help them feel better. I don't agree so much with the esteem part because I do not understand what they mean by "esteem" in this content. 

By this definition, your mate can be called a "friend". This question came to my mind as I was hanging out with a long time best friend of mine. I always wonder how do we pick are friends. Is it true that our friends represent a part of us that we are not allowed to show do to our position in society? I also wonder what make you no longer want to be friends with someone. There are many different question that can come about with this definition, but I know for a fact in my case that my friends are my family, clear-mind in a storm, and shoulder to cry on. I could go on and on about this topic, but I want to hear from you.

In the comments tell me what the word "friend" mean to you.

New Age Bullying

On this topic, I have mix emotions, so I'm keep it short. The educated woman in me is all for ending all types of bullying, but the bullied little girl in me is screaming "fuck that!!! I was bullied and every adult in my life knew, but they counter act the bullying by raising me and gave me encouragements and self esteem."

I know bullying is wrong. In all honesty, it needs to end like yesterday. To every child/teen who are being bullied or have been bullied, don't let any one's negative words hurt you. Remember it's not your fault, the problem do not live in you it lives in the other person. Trust me, just follow your dreams and keep doing what puts a smile on your face, and when you are on the top you see how a rough sand paper can only polish a diamond, but it can not hurt it. I have this question. What are you going to do to the parents of the bully? I see on the news the children that were doing the bullying being put in jail, but think where did they learn that? Look at the parents of the bully. They had to see the signs that their child had a bullying ways. I learn through some of my bullies that they learned it from their parents, older siblings, and other relatives. Now, I ask this, don't you believe that the parents of the bullies should be punished too?

Ashley Stewart: My favorite store

I am a big fan of Ashley Stewart! I have been wearing their clothes since I was a freshman in high school. I would say 95% of my closet is Ashley Stewart clothing. Out of all the stores that cater to the plus size woman, Ashley Stewart is the only store that make me feel like I can be a part of the new fashion. Most stores keep their clothes blend, and you don't feel like you would stand out in a crowd in them. Ashley Stewart on the other hand, make you feeling you are walking down a catwalk everyday. I always get compliment on my outfits that I get from this store more than anything else I have in my closet. I shop at the store located in Redford Michigan. That is my main Ashley Stewart store I shop at, unless they out of my size then I go to the Southfield store. I known the mangers there since I was a freshman in high school. They always there to help me and mom pick out the best outfits. They are also have helpful along with the rest of the staff. The store is always clean and playing the best music.  I remember one of the mangers (her name is Shaun) telling me "you been wearing our clothes for years they should make you this region spokes model" I love shopping there.

Me in one of the most popular summer outfits from Ashley Stewart i own(the whole outfit is from Ashley Stewart minus the shoes and necklace)

I admit that the clothes can me expensive specially in these hard times we all are in, but now they have more sells than ever. Rather if they are in stores, online, or both in stores and online. If you like their facebook page https://www.facebook.com/byAshleyStewart you get all types of coupons and promotions, and if you join their mailing list you get 15% off your full purchase on http://www.ashleystewart.com/ .

I love this store and their clothes. I could go on and on about this store but why? You go online and find the closest Ashley Stewart store and go shopping, You thank me later.

Today, the oldest of my little brothers left a comment on one this  "Meme" I post on my facebook. It said:

"Hey sis. Can I give you some advice? You should never make promises you can't keep. Everybody falls. The question is whether or not you get. You may fall, but you better always get back up. Now that is a promise you can keep." 

     I chuckled after I read it because he's right. I re-read what the "Meme" said and I could see how he came to this point.  His comment motivated me to write this post today.

     It's true, we all fall. We all have something in our lives that made us weak or "fall", but no matter how long it takes we always should get up and keep going. There have been many times in my life where I had fell, and double of those times I got back up.

    You should NEVER let something, someone, or even some event stop you from your goals in life. If life gives you a dead end, always look around because there is always a detour sign to help you get to your goal. I know it is hard and easier said than done, but once you see that you met the goal you be so happy that you kept going. The struggle is just that a struggle. Struggles do not last always, but you got to have the strength to over come the struggle, and not let the struggle you been through define who you are and what you do. It's OK for people to see you trip, stumble, and even fall, but it's more important for them to see you get up, dust your self off and keep going. To all my readers, remember you are bigger than what you are going through. You will come through the storm you currently in better and stronger than you was while you was in that storm. keep your head up.

Respect=Love

Ms. Tina Webster's post title Another love really got me to thinking, looking around me at my surroundings, and thinking some more. Here's the link to her blog post so you can read it as well.
http://myteencity.blogspot.com/2013/11/another-love.html

     After reading Ms. Webster's post, I really start to think about what I REALLY want in a man rather than what I was taught I needed FROM a man. I never really sat down and thought about it. Today, I sat down in my room with a pen and notebook. I sat there and just image what kind of life I wanted then what kind of family I wanted for myself. I start to write down all the qualities I liked for in my future mate. The first thing I wrote down wasn't humbleness(which was the second one on my list), height, and not even money making abilities. The first thing I wrote down was respect. I didn't even pay it any attention until I was done with my list. I thought about the word Respect.

    I start to look around me and I see so many young women around me being disrespected. I see how so many women being treated like dogs just because they carry their self to a higher standard than the norm require of them. I see it everyday men holding doors for the "pretty" girls and slamming doors on girls that look "average". I had guys let doors hit me without a second thought. I realize I want a man that respect me. Respect me as a woman, lover, friend, and most of all as a human being.

     I say this to all my young women out there. You are more than your thighs. You are more than your breast. You are more than the clothes you wear. You should show people how to respect you by showing yourself respect. A diamond is made miles underneath the ground. It takes a man days, months, and even years to reach a point of being able to see the diamond before they can dig it out. Let a man work to see you in your glory. One day he be able to say he worked hard for his diamond.

    Fellas, treat ALL women with respect. She is someone's grandmother, aunt, sister, cousin, and daughter. Act how you would want someone to treat your mother, sister, grandmother, aunt, and even your cousin. If you see or hear one of your friends mistreating or disrespecting women, Speak up. One act of standing up, can change a life time of behaviors.

What do you think? What is your top 5 qualities you want your mate to have or must have?

First Love

What is love? Love can be anything some will say. Others may say its anything good in your life. I notice the one sure answer to that question is there is no sure answer. I know the answer for me. To love for me, is to love unconditionally. That's what I do. I love unconditionally. I have a story of that.

Its my freshman year of high school. I was not popular but I had my friends and classmates I was cool with. I met this guy through one of my best friends. They went to middle school together. He had the biggest crush on my my best friend, and I had the biggest crush on him. Due to that, I never told a soul. My best friend knew with out me saying a word, and she tell me all the time to go for it, but I never did. As the years went on the guy became my best friend. We was your topical best friends, well at least to me. One day senior year he told me he had a girlfriend. I had a boyfriend, but I was so hurt that he had a girlfriend that I didn't talk to him for 2 months. How I did that when we went to the same high school, I do not know, but I did it. I start to text his girlfriend from his phone a few times and one day he let me talk to her on the phone. I never forget that moment as long as I live. I told her that I loved him and few other things. I SAID THIS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALLWAY WITH OUR CLASSMATES LISTENING ALONG WITH HIM. I couldn't believe I said that. I been friends with him for many years now, and I still love him. Even thou we never dated or be came a couple, I still love him as a wife loves her husband. I finally told him one day over the phone and he said he never knew I felt that way(I don't buy that at all). We still friends and my love still grows. What can I say? I'm the type of person once I love you that's it unless you betray me unlike no other. We both date and meet new people, like we should since we both single, but I just cant stop loving him. I play my role as best friend never letting the two cross, but no matter what I do I can stop the love. Who knows what the future holds, he may love back, he maybe my soulmate, or one day I just stop loving him. Who knows but after 10 years of loving someone I don't think it happen over night. Tell me, who was your first love and do you still love him/her?

LGBT FRATERNITITES

I saw something on Tumblr today that really had me thinking. It was a post about having more Christian and LGBT fraternities on college campuses. As a college students, I see Christian fraternities a lot, but my question is this How will the rest of the fraternities on campus feel about having openly express and showing LGBT fraternities on their "yard"? I am not dumb to the fact that there are some LGBT fraternities out here and you may be walking by a member of one with out knowing it.

The reason I post this question is this: We all know how much hate is shown towards the LGBT community. Now with fraternities out in the open, where they should be because no one should have to hide or a group should not have to hide, wouldn't that cause more hate crimes on College campuses? Like I said in my previous posts about this topic, I do not care who you love just as long as they are respecting you and giving you the same love back as you giving to them. I think that there are still a lot of work that needs to be done against the bad stigma of the LGBT community before we can go to next step as in fraternities. I have many gay and lesbian friends and I do not want them to be shun or hurt because they joined a LGBT fraternities. TO BE FRANK... we need more work as a whole. More understanding and peace between us as humans before we can truly say we have made a difference in this world. I think it be a good idea to have the LGBT fraternities bond and build a friendship with the Black fraternities since at one point they were kept off college campus and had to fight from their own piece of the pie. what do you think?

"What's your favorite scary movie?" Halloween special post

Halloween is around the corner. In honor of Halloween, I will be listing a few of my favorite scary things/ movies in this post.  LET’S start with movies:

1

.       1 Nightmare on Elm Street: It doesn’t matter which one. The fact I can die in my sleep or awake scares me.

2.      2  Halloween: Mike Myres scares me

3.      3  Friday the 13^th : Nothing scarier than a  undead mom’s boy

4.      4  Steven King’s The It: Clowns are creepy

5.       5 Scream: This movie is the reason I don’t answer any landline phones

 I have a few questions to all of you. What a makes you scream with pure horror? What’s your favorite horror movie?

Spirit Day

Today is Spirit Day. This is a day to educate people on the horror of bullying, and teach young people to stand up to bullying. Today is the day to teach children to stand up to bullying, but not through fighting, yet by speaking up to up against the bully and tell an adult. It’s important for us as adults to teach children not to bully others because their different, and to tell an adult there is an act of bullying taken place.

I have my own personal stories of bullying. I experience bullying from classmates all the way to my own family members. It was a hard time for me and I still have my own struggles with it even today. I had friends who would stand up for me, and even teachers who took a stand against. My bullying story started in the fourth grade. It was valentine day and I gave a boy I had a crush on a card. He came over to me, and he picked up a red dictionary and began to hit me over and over again. Ever since then I would be scared to tell a guy I liked or crush on him. I even wore black every year until recently. I remember the school faculty tries to blame me for the fight. My parents took me out of the school.

Bullying is a topic I take seriously. To all you out there that are going through bullying, it will get better, trust me! I know it’s hard but it will get better. If you being bullied, tell an adult you can trust. If you see someone being bullied, take a stand! Tell an adult immediately and tell the bully it’s not cool to bully someone. We can end all the acts of teen suicides and youth trying to harm themselves. Don't let NO ONE convince you to end your life or hurt yourself. Keep your head up! I LOVE YOU ALL!